Grog!

Aaaaargh!  No, I didn’t just stub my peg leg, ye fools, it’s International Talk Like a Pirate Day again!  This silly celebration sets sail on September 19 each year so it’s time to engage in more ribaldry and weigh anchor on another fine adventure.  Ye may recall my prittle-prattle last year when we took to the high seas and plundered Miyamoto’s Pirate Chest while getting squiffy with a Dark and Stormy cocktail.  Well buckle yer bootstraps cause this year we’ll feather yer nest with another fine fancy to pair and ponder.  

Now don’t be looking like death’s head upon a mop stick, me hearties, there’s rum to be had!  But don’t ye be drinking it all at once – who knows when we’ll have the chance to steal some more?  We’ll just stretch it out for the long journey – a little trick we learned from those scallywags in the Navy.  We’ll add some lovely limes to keep away the scurvy, a little brown sugar (pirates can be sweet, too, ye know), and dilute it up with water (hope it’s fresh, but bah, the rum should kill off anything nasty) so’s to make it go farther.  

Grog! circa 1655-1740

What’s that ye say?  Why it’s Grog, of course! And a rum fine nip of Nelson’s folly it is, too.  Just mix up these four fellows, as the old rhyme says: one of sour, two of sweet, three of strong, four of weak.  Now, being the rum bluffer I am, I used some extra fine rum just for ye, dark and aged well, so don’t hang the jib unless ye want a dowse on the chops.  They say this pirate potion was actually conceived of by British Vice Admiral Edward Vernon in the 1700’s, reputed to wear a coat of grogram cloth and known as “Old Grog”, but I say that tale’s all higgledy piggledy.  He must have been a pirate.  We’ll sort this scuttlebutt out one of these odd-come-shortlys, but let’s not waste more time – there’s Grog in yer hand (or hook) so sluice yer gobs, guzzle guts!  Splice the main brace and get plundering!  Bottoms Up!

This rum treasure chest keeps ye puzzling till yer groggy!

Grog

1-2 oz dark rum (dependin’ on the gen’rosity of yer Capn’)

1 oz fresh lime juice

1 oz demerara syrup or brown sugar

4 oz water (fresh, if ye can wrest it from the bilge rats)

Shake over ice and pour it down yer bung hole (or a tankard filled with crushed ice will do)

Now, be nice, blast ye, and leave a comment, or I'll see yer scragged!